Anastasia: Thank you for calling. How may I help you?
Patron: Um, I missed the Rush concert last month and I was wondering if I could get a refund.
Anastasia: (No, you moron, you don't call a month later asking for a refund). I'm sorry, ma'am, but there is no way to get you a refund for this show. We don't refund for missing a performance.
Patron: But you have to understand what happened! (here we go) I was on my way to the show and I got pulled over by the cops for speeding. When they ran my license they found an outstanding warrant for a missed court appearance and took me to jail (oh my good word) and I had to stay overnight. See, it wasn't my fault I missed the show!
Anastasia: (Uh, yeah, it is your fault, you moron. If you know you have a checkered past, you don't speed and invite the cops to pull you over!) Well, I am sorry to hear that. But I am afraid there is nothing that we can do. The event has been closed out and the money has been settled with the artist.
Patron: Oh, well, ok, I just thought I'd check.
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